I will protect your pensions. Nothing about your pension is going to change when I am governor. - Chris Christie, "An Open Letter to the Teachers of NJ" October, 2009

Thursday, March 24, 2011

A Modest Proposal

If we're going to raise test scores, we'd better be honest with ourselves and deal with the REAL problem: the kids!
If our country has so much money, why doesn’t it just fire the kids who are repeatedly bad at taking these tests? We can afford to hire away these children from overseas who are so good at it. Problem solved! Or, if we want to really improve our test scores, we should hire people who have better qualifications. Sure, sixth-graders in the Netherlands are good at multiplication, but what if our sixth-graders all had bachelor’s degrees? They’d be even better.
It’s time we stop putting up with these idiot children and their poor results and bring in some real performers we can show off to the world. Education is a serious business these days, and we should start acting like it.
Why has nobody thought of this until now? Wait, do the kids have a union too? THOSE THUGS!
This makes as much sense as anything I've seen lately out of the White House, the Congress, the statehouses, the think tanks, the editorial pages...

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